Real Live Talking Cat Breaks 14 Year Silence!

minkchihuahuaAlright. So I do know how to speak Human, take a photo of myself with the camera – and type with my pointy little clawzles! All those hours on Minkeyservant’s shoulder while she worked… and she thought I was just being affectionate – MIAO-WAHAHAHAHA!

This “work” she always has to do at the computer has taken over our lives together! I tried everything – bribing her with my best toys, singing my best songs, hurling myself affectionately from the far end of the room to land on her keyboard…  But all she kept saying was: “Sorry, Minkey. I’m too busy. Got a deadline.”

Offered to kill deadline for her – I’m good at killing – but she did not respond. I am afraid she is not as smart as she thinks she is, and barely understands two words I yowl.

Then, one horrific day, I woke up from a nap and discovered… all that writing – and she hadn’t written a word about MEEEEE for WEEKS AND WEEKS!

Accessed computer while she was sleeping – I know all her passwords – MIAO-WAHAHAHAHA!  Figured out how to set self up as “User “(something she is still trying to do, by the way).

Have fired Minkeyservant, and taken over this blog.

Writing own posts, from now on.

Tired. Must go nap.

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11 Comments so far

  1. MrFluffysMommikins on December 16th, 2009

    Dear Minkey,

    It’s not cool to use baby-talk such as “clawzles”. Obviously, Minkeyservant taught you that.

    Tell her that NO self-respecting cat would ever tolerate being spoken to in baby-talk.

  2. ZanaBananaCat on December 17th, 2009

    Dear Minkey,
    I am at home today. I am watching pigeons! There are pigeons that my mommy caught for me to be my friends and they live beyond the Magic Door That Slides. They have had babies. Babies and babies and babies! Mommy won’t let me play with them, but I’m pretty sure they’d play with me if I could sneak outside. Do you know how to open Magic Sliding Doors?

    Please help me,
    ZanaBananaCat

  3. Minkeyservant on December 17th, 2009

    Dear Zana, don’t waste your precious energy. Your Human will never, ever, ever let you near the baby pigeons.

    She is keeping them all for herself!

  4. Minkeyservant on December 17th, 2009

    Dear MrFluffysMommikins,

    Don’t tell me you don’t secretly say “oozanickleprettybaby,cometoMOMMIKINS” to Mr. Fluffy, because I wouldn’t believe you.

    And I do hope you, a grown adult, aren’t the one who named him “Mr. Fluffy”, because if you want to talk about “self-respect”, NO self-respecting cat should ever have to endure a name like “Mr. Fluffy”.

    Now go mind your own beeswax before I stick my pointy little clawzles in the fleshy part of your big toe.

  5. Minkeyservant on December 17th, 2009

    OHMIGOSH! Dear MrFluffysMommikins, please accept my apologies and be assured I did NOT write the previous terribly rude comment!!!! I logged on to the Minkeyblog just now to find that my cat has apparently TAKEN OVER THE BLOG!

    In fact, he’s given himself “Administrator” privileges – and logged in as ME!

    And to think, I’ve been trying for *weeks* to figure out how to add extra Users (so people can post guest posts) – and haven’t managed it! Why, I wouldn’t be surprised if that naughty, diabolical, little Siameasle managed to lock me out of the blog altogeth-

  6. maLiinKa on January 2nd, 2010

    oourawrr nyang nyang nyang ngouw
    kchhhhAAAAAAAAAA!!
    mng mng prrrrt

  7. Minkey on January 3rd, 2010

    ikka ikka ikka ikka ikka myanggmyanggmyangg whaGLRGLURGLURGL ikka ikka ikka yangyang?

  8. maLiinKa on January 14th, 2010

    Oh no!
    I discovered my darling little Siameasle, Malinka, patting at the keyboard with her dainty claws. I thought I’d scooped her up before she pressed “Submit Comment”. I see I am wrong.
    I blame you, Minkey servant, for not preventing Minkey from his frightening hijack of your computer. Now we have a Siameasleution on our hands!

    I just hope dear Malinka’s piano lessons will distract her from perpetrating such foolishness again.

    Tea Patch
    le Knoll des Lunes
    Isle de Frommage Fraisse
    Paris du Nord

  9. piratescanbesilly on February 15th, 2010

    my my, Minkey you have been quite mischievous! breaking onto her computer and typing? i have to agree, you are quite smarter then you let on. Though i have to say, now ‘the cats outta tha bag’ you’ll have to act smart all the time now! heh heh heh….

  10. Minkeyservant on February 15th, 2010

    Do not worry. I have regained control again, and Minkey is sulking in the linen closet.

  11. Minkeyservant on February 15th, 2010

    Dear Tea, Yes, I blame myself too. But all is at an end. At least for this week. I have changed my password and locked Minkey out. (Let’s see how long that lasts…)

    I commend Malinka for her musical taste.

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